


Too Late For a Fresh Start

by GiuGiu



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Childhood Trauma, Drug Use, F/M, Kid Fic, allison and klaus are dress up buddies, my kiddos are sweet until their trauma fucks them up too bad, thats life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 21:51:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17836796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GiuGiu/pseuds/GiuGiu
Summary: They were six when Klaus dared Diego to eat the beetle he’d found in the courtyard. Her brother had laughed with a manic glee and crowed in delight when Diego swallowed the crawly black thing.Allison realized that even though Klaus liked girly things, he was still just as gross as her other brothers.Basically this is little pieces of Allison and Klaus' relationship that show how their family fell apart.





	Too Late For a Fresh Start

**Author's Note:**

> I just want to point out that they called Ben by his name during the bank robbery scene. And Number Five was still around for that. So him not having a name seems like some deliberate stubbornness on his part.
> 
> Also, timelines are hard when we don't know when the fuck anything happened.

They were five when Four crept into Three’s room after bedtime. She was still awake, looking at the stars from her window.

“Hi.” Her brother giggled, caught up in the adrenaline rush of being naughty.

“Hi.” She grinned. She ran over to him and hugged him tight. She loved all her brothers and sister, but Four was special. He liked to do girly things with her. Even though Dad got mad about it.

“Do you wanna dress up?” She asked, already pulling him towards her wardrobe. She pulled out the dress Dad had gotten for her, for a charity ball he took her to a few days ago. It was light green with pretty white lace around the neck and at the sleeves. Three had looked amazing in it, but she wanted to see how her brother looked.

“It’s so pretty,” he whispered, fingering the lace. He yanked his pajama bottoms down and Three helped him unbutton his shirt. Carefully, he slipped the dress over his head. Three tied the bow in the back the way Grace had done for her. She looked over Four’s shoulder to see his reflection in the mirror. “Wow,” he gasped in delight, “I look...”

“Like a princess.” Three whispered before kissing his cheek. It was true, Four’s pale skin was almost the color of the lace. And his eyes, so big and green looked even brighter with the light green fabric. For a moment, Three felt jealous. Had she looked this pretty? She wasn’t sure.

But then her brother whirled around and threw his arms around her and she wasn’t jealous anymore.

They got into her bed and pulled the covers over their heads. They spent the night giggling and telling silly stories about princesses and dragons and ogres. And when Grace found them sleeping, entwined, in the morning, she only helped Four take the dress off and ushered them to the kitchen with their siblings.

☂☂☂

They were six when Klaus dared Diego to eat the beetle he’d found in the courtyard. Her brother had laughed with a manic glee and crowed in delight when Diego swallowed the crawly black thing.

Allison realized that even though Klaus liked girly things, he was still just as gross as her other brothers.

☂☂☂

They were seven when Dad decided Allison and Vanya could have nail polish. Which meant that Klaus could have nail polish. Even though he could only paint his toes, because Dad might _know_ that his son was really into having bright purple nails, but that didn’t mean he wanted to _see_ it.

So Klaus was sitting in Allison’s room, sparkly purple polish drying, while he painted her fingernails a sickly pink.

Which was when Luther came in. He stood in the doorway, watching. “Isn’t that just for girls?” He finally asked.

“I dunno.” Klaus shrugged, wiping at a stray glob of pink on his sister’s pretty brown skin.

“Does Dad know you’re doing this?”

“I guess.” Klaus finally lifted his head to look up at his sister. She was frowning at their brother.

“I don’t think you should do this. It seems wrong. You shouldn’t like girl stuff.”

Klaus’ chest started to feel heavy. He hated it when his brothers said things like this. Klaus rubbed away the tears starting to fall. Why did Luther have to be mean?

“Luther,” Allison said in her sing-song way that usually meant one thing. Klaus sucked in a breath. “I heard a rumor that you were going to play outside with Five.”

“Oh. Yeah.” Their brother wandered away towards the stairs.

Klaus grinned at his sister. “You’re amazing.”

“I know. Can you paint a flower on my thumb?”

☂☂☂

They were eight when Allison realized Klaus was more different than she thought. They were looking at magazines in his room with Ben when it happened.

Ben had decided that Klaus was his favorite brother a few months ago and Klaus had been very flattered. So now the two boys were always together. Which was fine, Allison loved Ben.

But Klaus wasn’t as girly when Ben was around. She missed that.

They were looking at magazines full of famous people. They all had perfect hair and glowy skin. The boys had lots of muscles and the girls were super skinny.

Allison wanted to be like that.

“I want to be famous one day.” She whispered, caressing a glossy picture.

“Me too,” Klaus agreed.

Ben hummed and turned the page of his chapter book. “Isn’t that what Dad’s trying to do?” He asked his siblings. “Make us famous? With our powers?”

Klaus grinned at his brother. “Do you think famous people marry other famous people?”

“Yes,” Allison blurted quickly, desperate to answer before Ben. She was rewarded when her brother’s big eyes turned on her. Klaus was smiling and held up a picture of a shirtless man in a cowboy hat and leather chaps.

“Good. I want to marry _him_.”

☂☂☂

They were nine when Allison realized that all because she liked her power, it didn’t mean all her brothers liked theirs.

Ben was in his room, crying. Allison stood outside his door, unsure of what she should do. Her brother had killed three people on their mission, and he was so sad.

She loved Ben, but she had no idea how to make him feel better.

Klaus would though.

She found him in the kitchen. Under the table.

“You know, this isn’t a good hiding spot.” She commented, sitting down next to him.

“I’m not hiding.” He murmured. He didn’t look good either. His pretty pale skin was sweaty and his curly hair looked ragged, like it had been tugged on too many times.

But his eyes, normally so bright and expressive, were dull and haunted.

“Uh huh. You just like sitting under tables?”

“Maybe I love it.” He was rocking slightly, she noticed.

“Are you okay? You look… sick.”

“‘m fine. How’s Ben?”

“He’s a mess. Can you go talk to him? I think that would help.”

“No. Um. No. Mom can talk to him. I can’t, I --” His hands reached up and yanked at his strung-out curls. “I can’t. Sorry.”

“Klaus, you’re his best friend. You have to --”

“Allison,” Klaus whined and turned to look at her. “Alli, I can’t. They’re up there with him and they’re all,” Klaus made some violent gestures across his face. “And they’re saying such horrible things. I don’t want to hear it. I can’t,”

Allison watched her brother start to gasp in the way he did whenever he got really scared. What was it called again? A panic attack? “Who’s up there Klaus?”

“Them! The guys Ben killed on the train. They’re up there. And they’re so awful. So so so awful.” He hunched over his folded legs and took his shaky breaths, tears falling down his cheeks. “I’m sorry. I want to help him.”

“I know,” Allison rubbed his damp back, trying to soothe him.

☂☂☂

They were ten when she found Klaus throwing up in the bathroom when everyone else was asleep. She had had a nightmare and had planned on sneaking into Klaus’ bed for the night.

Only to find his bed empty.

Instead, she found him downstairs in the bathroom near the lounge. A bottle of Dad’s honey colored liquor sat next to him. She watched him puke. Shocked. When he stopped he looked up at her with streaming red eyes and a runny nose.

“I just want them to go away,” he choked out between sobs. That night, she had made him promise to never drink again.

The next night, she found him in the same exact spot.

☂☂☂

They were eleven when Klaus decided that maybe he didn’t like Dad very much. He wasn’t sure how to say that to his brothers or sisters though. So he left the house at two am.

He sat on a bench for an hour. Just watching cars go by.

Then he shoplifted a pair of pink jeggings from the 24-hour convenience store and walked home. Allison wasn’t angry when he showed them to her, just sad.

Dad had Pogo confiscate them. But the adrenaline rush from it all felt like a soothing balm on his raw soul.

☂☂☂

They were twelve when Allison really started to realize how fucked her family was. They were famous now. True celebrities, just like she and Klaus had wanted when they were eight. But the pressure that came with everyone knowing her, was so so heavy.

And she knew her brothers felt it too. Could see them changing, cracking, reshaping.

Or maybe that was normal for their age? It was all so confusing.

Luther and Diego seemed to be fighting constantly, about anything and everything. Ben was doing his best impression of an ostrich, with his head always shoved in a book so he could avoid most human interaction. Vanya was basically invisible, never spending any time with them unless she was required to. Five was always challenging Dad’s authority. And Klaus, well. Klaus had started using his meager allowance to buy weed from the creepy guy who stood in front of the 7/11.

Klaus was weird on drugs. It was like his personality was multiplied. He was extra loud, extra emotional, extra annoying. It meant he went from being picked on for his big mouth and stupid comments some of the time, to all of the time. Allison loved her brothers, but they certainly knew how to be assholes.

She really wished Klaus would spend his allowance on pink jeggings instead.

☂☂☂

They were thirteen when Five didn’t come back. He stormed out like always did. Angry and offended. It was typical.

But then he wasn’t in his room the next morning. Or the morning after that.

Allison watched Klaus swallow a pill.

“What was that?” She asked. They were supposed to be studying French but language studies were boring. She could make anyone understand her, so why bother with other languages?

“Good question.” Klaus grinned.

“You don’t know?” She could feel her mouth fall open in shock.

“I will in a few minutes.” He winked and then turned to drape himself over an unamused Ben.

After that, it was alcohol and weed and pills. And Klaus said they made him feel good. He said they dulled his power. He made Allison and Ben promise not to tell Dad.

Klaus hated Dad and he hated the missions, but he didn’t know what would happen if Dad didn’t let him go with the others.

☂☂☂

They were fourteen when Luther left a poem from their literature studies textbook on her pillow. Beside it sat an orange marigold from Mom’s flowerbed.

_S h_ _e walks in beauty, like the night_

_Of cloudless climes and starry skies;_

_And all that’s best of dark and bright_

_Meet in her aspect and her eyes_

And she wasn’t sure what to think. But it felt like a million butterflies were caressing her skin and she was so excited. She ran down the hall to Klaus’ room. Ready to share her happiness with her favorite brother.

She knocked on his door. And knocked. She was about to look for him elsewhere when she heard him shout “BUSY.”

So she yanked the door open, excitement spilling around her.

Only to find her brother shirtless, in the lap of a stranger. At her sudden appearance he jumped out of the stranger’s lap and turned to face her. “What the fuck, Allison!”  
She took in his bruised lips, smudged eyeliner, and half-unzipped pants. “Oh my god.” Her happiness was gone. Replaced by cold, heavy dread. “What are you _doing_ , Klaus? Who’s this guy?”

“Wow, that’s really none of your business. Get out!”

She was pushed out of his room. The door slammed shut behind her. Damn. Where was Ben when she needed him? He seemed to be the only one who could keep Klaus in line these days. She wasn’t even sure why she was so determined to stop Klaus exactly. Maybe because Klaus was only fourteen. Maybe because the stranger looked like he was thirty. Maybe because she was jealous. Maybe because she didn’t want Klaus to make a mistake he couldn’t take back. Maybe it was all of the above.

She knocked on the door. She tried to the doorknob, it was locked. Fuck, she was going to have to do this. She wiped at her eyes.

“Klaus, I heard a rumor,” she took a wet breath, “that you’re going to ask your guest to leave.”

Klaus was pissed at her for a week. But Allison had a new favorite brother.

☂☂☂

They were fifteen when Allison really needed her pink sundress. She was going to sneak out with Luther after dinner to get some ice cream and really, it was the sundress or nothing. She was stubborn like that.

So she checked the laundry room. Under her bed. She asked Mom. She asked Pogo. She even asked Diego, who had just sneered and walked away.

She was about to rip her hair out when Klaus happened to walk by.

In her pink sundress.

To say they fought would be an understatement. But she had the dress and a scoop of Double Fudge Delight so she comforted herself with the knowledge that she had won.

☂☂☂

They were sixteen when Dad found out about Klaus’ drug habit.

Allison was pretty sure that banning Klaus from missions was the stupidest thing for him to do.

Dad could have sent him to rehab. Or gotten him a therapist. Or even confiscated his drugs.

But instead, Klaus was left in a quiet house, with lots of drugs, knowing that his family was out risking their lives.

Needless to say, Klaus got worse. And Dad got angrier.

☂☂☂

They were seventeen when Ben died. And really, it all unraveled from there.

Diego left.

Klaus started using needles.

Allison watched Luther go from hesitant leader to lost boy.

☂☂☂

They were eighteen when Allison left. Unable to look at Klaus’ sallow complexion or Luther’s confused stare.

☂☂☂

They were twenty when Allison starred in her own movie. A day before it premiered, Diego sent her a letter, telling her Klaus was in prison.

☂☂☂

They were twenty-four and Allison was getting married. And she felt cheated for a moment, knowing that she couldn’t freak out with Klaus because _she was a famous person marrying a famous person!_ Just like they had dreamed about.

And Patrick wanted to know how many invitations they would need to send to her family. “Three,” she had whispered. The number still felt overly familiar.

Luther, Vanya, and Diego came for the ceremony. But none of them stayed for the reception.

☂☂☂

They were twenty-nine when Allison found herself asking “Is that my skirt?”

But instead of the rage she had felt the last time Klaus took her clothes, she felt the warm delight they had shared during their secret dress up sessions.

Back when Klaus was just Four. And she was just Three. And everything was simple and fun. When she could kiss her brother on the cheek and call him a princess and they could cuddle and talk about anything.

But that was then, and this was now. They were too old for frilly dresses. They knew each other too well at this point. It was too late for a fresh start.

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is http://les-waff.tumblr.com/ if you wanna chat ;)


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